Chapter 61: Sprayed All Over Her Face (Third Update—Please Vote for Monthly Tickets)

(Three chapters tonight, and there is at least one more to come. What are you waiting for? Send those monthly votes flying!)

Fatty had already begun rolling his eyes, every ounce of fat on his body trembling. Although Peanut had reached him, he did nothing. He merely stared at him with a grave expression.

I ran over as well. “Peanut, think of something! How did that thing come back to life?”

Zhuge Xuan stepped forward and said, “We absolutely cannot touch them right now. The Nether Kui is already inside his body. If we interrupt it, the parts that have burrowed inside will crawl back out through Fatty’s flesh.”

“What?” My head began to spin. “Then what are we supposed to do? Are we really just going to stand here and watch Fatty have his body taken over by the Nether Kui?”

Peanut’s expression was unbearably solemn. He stared at the Nether Kui, apparently lost in thought. But before long, he slowly closed his eyes.

“There’s nothing we can do.”

“What?” I froze.

Peanut continued, “Fatty is beyond saving. Before the Nether Kui completely occupies his body, we can only burn them both to death.”

I had never expected Peanut to say something so despairing. Looking at Fatty, I was frantic with anxiety.

“Is this really the only way?” I asked quietly.

Peanut did not answer.

I slowly turned my head and saw that very little of the Nether Kui’s body remained outside. Knowing Fatty’s temperament, I was certain he would rather die than surrender his body to such a thing.

Yet for some reason, I simply could not bring myself to give up so quickly.

“We have to hurry. If the Nether Kui wakes up...” As Zhuge Xuan spoke, she had already carried over the smokeless stove.

“Wait!” I shouted.

Suddenly, I thought of something and hurried to the equipment bag. After rummaging through it, I pulled out a dagger.

Peanut seemed to know what I intended to do. “It’s useless. It’s already too late.”

I looked at him and said quietly, “I’m used to doing useless things anyway. I don’t mind doing one more.”

When I finished speaking, both Peanut and Zhuge Xuan stared at me in astonishment.

“Fatty. You don’t look like a man destined for an early grave. If you can still hear me, you’d better keep your wits about you.”

As I spoke, I placed the dagger against the palm of my left hand and slashed hard. Blood immediately ran down my wrist.

I raised that hand above Fatty’s head and let the blood fall over him and the Nether Kui.

Watching my blood slide across their bodies, I gritted my teeth and waited for a miracle.

But until the Nether Kui’s body had almost completely vanished, the miracle I was waiting for never appeared.

By then, Zhuge Xuan had already unscrewed the lid of the smokeless stove. The hand I had held in the air slowly went limp. I still wanted to slap Fatty once more, but Peanut caught my wrist.

He shook his head at me.

“This is what tomb robbers are.”

After hearing Peanut say that, countless emotions welled up inside me once more. In the past, I would have let those thoughts run wild through my mind. But now, I was sickened by such meaningless reflections from the bottom of my heart. No matter how much I struggled or how unwilling I was to accept it, nothing could change the reality before me.

No one could be blamed for this—not even the Nether Kui. We were all merely doing what we had to do.

Fatty remained crouched on the ground, his eyes beginning to redden. His swollen mouth was still moving, and eyeballs were rolling inside it. His stomach had not grown any larger, which left us wondering where all those things had gone.

For a moment, I thought, Perhaps we should just leave him alone. Let things be. After all...

But just as I was about to voice the thought to Peanut, his gaze stopped me.

I immediately realized that it was a foolish idea.

With a sigh, Zhuge Xuan said, “Goodbye, you dead lump of lard. You were a nuisance, and I hated you before, but I admit that you were truly...”

She had only just reached that point when Fatty suddenly pitched forward.

With a wet roar, a mouthful of red liquid burst from his lips and splattered directly across Zhuge Xuan’s face.

It happened so suddenly that we all froze.

Then Fatty began spewing the red fluid from his mouth like a broken water pump. Zhuge Xuan and I were hit one after another. That wretched Peanut, however, dodged with astonishing speed and did not get a single drop on him.

Zhuge Xuan looked the most pitiful of all. She stood there stupidly with the smokeless stove in her hands, as though a friend had suddenly doused her from head to toe in paint.

The red liquid did not stink, but its smell was undeniably strange.

After vomiting for a while, Fatty finally stopped.

“What... what is going on?” I hurriedly looked at Peanut.

Peanut seemed just as bewildered. He stepped forward, hauled Fatty off the ground, and clamped one hand beneath his chin, apparently examining his face.

Suddenly, Fatty opened his mouth again, and another mouthful of red liquid surged out.

Peanut did not show the slightest trace of surprise. He simply tilted his neck aside with effortless grace. The red fluid traced a beautiful arc through the air and landed directly on my forehead.

I was horrified, but at the same time I cursed inwardly, What a shame! How the hell did you dodge that? That isn’t scientifically possible!

“Strange,” Peanut murmured suspiciously as he set Fatty back on the ground.

The instant Fatty sat down, he let out a burp. Then he slowly opened his eyes and looked up at us.

His eyes were no longer red, and his breathing seemed to have returned to normal. My heart began pounding.

“Could Fatty already be the Nether Kui?”

“Peanut, what exactly...”

Before I could finish asking, Peanut, who had been frowning deeply all this time, suddenly burst out laughing.

His laughter came without warning, as though a knot in his heart had abruptly unraveled. It was the laughter of complete relief. Yet the more he laughed, the less he seemed able to stop, until I began to feel a chill run through me.

“Peanut, are you all right?” I stepped forward and asked in a low voice.

At that moment, Peanut pointed at me again. I flinched as he roared with laughter.

“Ha ha... heh heh... I... ha ha ha...”

“What’s wrong with you? Is Fatty dead or alive?” I asked blankly.

Gradually, I began to feel that Peanut had gone slightly mad. He laughed so hard he could barely breathe. He did not answer me, merely sitting on the ground and looking around on his own.

I felt that everything had descended into chaos. Fatty’s fate was still unknown, Peanut seemed to have lost his mind, and Zhuge Xuan, drenched in red liquid, stood there like a wooden post. As for me, my head was still filled with questions.

After a long while, Fatty mumbled, “Yuan Jie, you heartless bastard. Get over here and help me up. And give me some water.”

I stared at him, then immediately said, “Fatty, are you all right?”

I wanted to examine him, but at the thought of the Nether Kui, I still stopped nervously.

By then, Peanut had also composed himself. With a faint smile, he said, “He’s fine now.”

“He’s fine?” I asked. “What about the Nether Kui?”

Peanut smiled and shook his head.

“It’s gone.”

I observed Fatty again and saw no sign of anything abnormal on him, so I went over and helped him up. After drinking nearly half a flask of water, Fatty finally became more lucid.

“What the hell happened? Where’s that monster?” Fatty repeatedly looked around.

“I spat it all out for you,” I told him, then explained everything that had happened afterward.

Fatty listened, then looked at Peanut with a puzzled expression.

“That thing had already entered my body. Why did I end up vomiting it back out?”

He was asking Peanut, but Peanut did not answer. So I said, “We don’t know yet. Maybe the Nether Kui took one look at all that fat on you and regretted its decision. It would rather kill itself than borrow your body.”

Fatty laughed. “Nonsense. It’s simply because your Uncle Fatty has been blessed with an enormous fortune and an iron life. Girl, am I right?”

He said this absently to Zhuge Xuan. Only then did she move.

“I don’t know about that. But if I don’t take your life today, you filthy fat pig, I’ll be letting down the ancestors of my Zhuge family.”

With that, Zhuge Xuan charged at Fatty, carrying the smokeless stove.

What the hell was this about? He had only sprayed her in the face, and he hadn’t done it on purpose. Was there really any need for this? Besides, fat pigs didn’t have “dog lives.” Wasn’t she only making herself sound uneducated?

(To be continued...)