Volume One, Chapter 22: Ah Kei’s Bitter Thunder Roar—Hey, Monkey!
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The barrage of comments seemed to capture Lin Yiming’s tone perfectly.
[That’s incredible! Not a single step was out of order. Every part was carried out with extraordinary precision and patience.]
[At first, I didn’t even want to take part in a variety show like this. Watching someone cook something I didn’t understand, even from in front of a computer, would have been torture!]
[But I never expected to witness Shen Qi’s astonishingly brilliant technique!]
[Just seeing the Bean Sprouts with Inlaid Beans and the Three-Treasure Deboned Fish made it all worthwhile. I haven’t seen cooking techniques this professional in years!]
[At my age, I really have to say…]
[I’m stunned!]
The studio instantly erupted in delighted laughter.
Fang Qian smiled. “This only goes to show how superb Shen Qi’s skills are. Even Teacher Lin Yiming, who is usually so serious, has become playful.”
It was nothing more than a simple home-cooked meal, yet under Lin Yiming’s explanations, everyone finally realized just how extraordinary Shen Qi was.
There were not many people Lin Yiming would praise, and even fewer who could leave him astonished.
Strictly speaking, when it came to culinary skill alone, there were probably no more than a handful of people in the entire country who could rival him.
Everyone in the studio wore an expression of shock.
Bai Qinghe and Lin Xiaolu’s minds were both struggling to keep up.
Was he really that good?
Thinking of the men in their own households, they had to admit that, at least in terms of cooking, neither could compare with Shen Qi.
But then they relaxed again. This was, after all, a live show about taking care of children. As long as one could make a tasty home-cooked meal, that was enough.
Besides, they had already violated the show’s rules and informed their husbands in advance.
Their husbands were accomplished professionals. Surely they couldn’t lose to a kept man?
It would be fine!
Zhuo Yiyi had kept hold of Li Huange’s arm the entire time, while Li Huange’s red lips remained slightly parted.
Were the dishes he made at home really this difficult?
If Lin Yiming’s praise was anything to go by, Shen Qi had to be one of the finest culinary masters in the country. Someone like that, paid two hundred thousand a month… It actually wasn’t much at all!
Once again, there was only one possible explanation: Shen Qi loved her! Loved her with the kind of passion that could make heaven and earth collapse!
…
On the screen, Shen Qi saw that the water had begun to boil and turned the heat down to low.
“Tsk, tsk, tsk… This dish is turning out quite well! In a moment…”
“Huh? Where’s my lard?”
Lin Yiming began explaining again.
[Exactly! After simmering it over low heat for twenty minutes, you have to drizzle it with lard!]
[After that, move it over to high heat to reduce and thicken the sauce, then take it out of the wok and plate it.]
[That’s how you make the dish perfectly!]
After drizzling the lard over the dish, Shen Qi used the time while the sauce reduced to stir-fry two simple home-style dishes.
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Those two simple dishes seemed to give the more than ten million people watching the livestream a chance to catch their breath. At last, everyone began recovering from their shock.
[Holy crap, I’m blind. Why are they showing me this?]
[Don’t say another word. I just signed my husband up for a cooking class. If he can’t learn, he doesn’t need to come home.]
[I’m starving…]
[Seeing how carefully Shen Qi is cooking for Xiaokun brings tears of emotion to my eyes!]
Fu Qing had yet to recover from the excitement of receiving the song when Shen Qi showed off once again.
“Damn… I used to badmouth Shen Qi so many times in front of Huange…”
“That was careless of me…”
“Judging by Shen Qi’s cooking alone, Huange really does have excellent taste in men.”
“No, this won’t do! I absolutely have to go to Huange’s place and try it. I’m practically drooling… I mean, salivating!”
The professionals had already explained the expertise Shen Qi displayed throughout the cooking process, and everyone had felt it for themselves.
What amazed them most was that, amid all that seriousness and patience, Shen Qi remained consistently relaxed and practiced. He treated the food with a kind of reverence, as though he had infused culinary culture with a soul and a faith of its own.
Just as everyone was immersed in that impression, Shen Qi suddenly shattered the harmonious and pure atmosphere in the kitchen.
Perhaps he was pleased with how dinner had turned out. Or perhaps he was happy to have helped Li Huange. Whatever the reason, Shen Qi suddenly grew cheerful and began twisting his body around again, just as he had that morning while singing “Picking Up Manure.”
He clasped both hands behind his head, shut his eyes tightly, and swayed with an expression of pure enjoyment.
“Mm-hmm, mm-hmm…”
He beat out a rhythm with beatboxing, then opened his mouth and launched straight into a song.
“Ah-kay koo-lay ho ya ho-hey~~~”
“Dee-dah loo-gong gah ho da-hey~~~”
“Gay-say gay-hong meh oh ya la-yeh~~~”
“Bee-ah lee gay-say—ho! Da! Hey!”
“Doo-loo~ doo-loo-loo-loo~ doo-loo doo-loo-loo~~~”
“Doo-loo~ doo-loo-loo-loo~ doo-loo doo-loo-loo~~~”
The barrage of comments across the livestream froze for a brief moment before exploding again.
[???]
[???]
[What the hell is he singing? First he picked up manure, and now he’s beating monkeys?]
[Huh? Why does he sound like he’s singing with curry in his voice?]
[It sounds so cheerful. It’s weirdly addictive!]
[Those dance moves are way too seductive. Hahahaha, I’m dying!]
[How can a man like this be so entertaining?]
Zhuo Yiyi had a low threshold for laughter and burst out laughing again.
Bai Qinghe and Lin Xiaolu couldn’t hold it in either. Clutching their stomachs, they rolled around in their large chairs.
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Fang Qian and Li Lei had lost the composure expected of hosts as well. Covering their mouths, they turned their heads away. They wanted to continue hosting, but could barely catch their breath.
Li Huange’s expression was incredibly complicated.
There was a hint of suppressed laughter beneath her embarrassment, and a trace of helplessness beneath her displeasure.
She had confirmed one more thing: Shen Qi was absolutely not as refined and gentle as she had previously believed. He was, in fact, a complete clown.
…
“Ah-kay koo-lay ho ya ho-hey~~~”
…
“Doo-loo~ doo-loo-loo-loo~ doo-loo doo-loo-loo~~~”
…
Shen Qi’s hips swayed with astonishing sensuality. After repeating the performance twice, he finally began serving the food.
He carried the dishes to the dining table, where he immediately saw Shen Xiaokun sitting on the sofa, his little face as dark as a lump of charcoal.
“Can you stop going ‘doo-loo-loo’?”
“Can you stop singing songs about picking up manure and beating monkeys?”
“I can understand a man entertaining himself while doing housework and cooking, but songs like those are practically an insult to music!”
“Whatever you do, don’t upload music like that to the ‘Behind-the-Scenes Boiling Shit’ account and send it to my mother’s company.”
“Even if someone buys it, you’d still be committing fraud!”
Shen Xiaokun’s little face was solemn, and his tiny-adult manner made the whole scene extraordinarily amusing.
Shen Qi said irritably, “Hey, you little brat! Your father works himself to the bone cooking, and he can’t even amuse himself a little? Watch it, or I’ll cut off your food supply!”
“You wouldn’t dare,” Shen Xiaokun challenged, lifting his chin.
“Say that again and I will!”
“If you dare, I’ll tell on you!”
“If you tell on me, I’ll dare!”
“If you dare, I’ll tell on you!”
…
Li Huange: “…”
…
[Hahahaha, this father and son are hilarious.]
[Which one is immature, Shen Qi or Xiaokun?]
[I think I finally understand what Shen Qi said to Xiaokun before. He really does treat Xiaokun as his equal.]
[Their relationship is genuinely enviable. My son is terrified of my husband, and our home has lost so much of this kind of joy.]
[I officially envy the Heavenly Queen Huange’s family!]